I was going to turn this stream of consciousness into a real blog post, but I think this is as good as I can manage right now. Spoilers ahead, obvs.
We open up with a lovely gloomy bit of Jon Snow grieving beyond the wall, and there was a pretty sweet bit where Ygritte is discussed by Jon and NORTHERN BOSS MAN. It's almost reverent that they don't say her name until they toast to her.
They then toast each other's lost ones from the battle, which is a nice way to show that the free folk are not as barbaric as they're supposed to be, and the confession that they're seeking refuge rather than conquest.
OH MY GOD, STANNIS?!
I do love the moment where he refuses to knee though, particularly when Jon Snow stands up for him in that very calm way. He's not one to throw a tizz is our Jon Snow.
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| Don't cry, sweetie. I love you really |
Then it's back to King's Landing and Cersei is watching over Ser Gregor's medical examination. Her constant dismissal of Grand Meister is wonderful to see. It's nice to see her still asserting some authority after she's been so frequently beaten down.
Then she goes to stand up to Daddy Lannister. He's a bit of a harsh man, and he does like to keep reminding his children of how much power he has over them, but her mother's instincts are pretty fierce. I have to admit, I do love her as a character.
OOOOOH SHE REVEALS THE BIG AFFAIR!
He's so against believing it! And she knows she'd crushing him. The rains of Catsermere playing in the background is the perfect way to highlight that his ideal of 'family' is falling around him.
Then she swans off to fight Jamie/snog Jamie. She is ON FORM.
Annnnd they're shagging.
Hi Dany!
She is continuing her benevolent leader-ing. Cotton-wool-beard-man is pointing out the flaws in her current system though. People do grow to love their chains, which is a throw back to her own words when she freed her first city.
Oh, what's this? A baby?
He's getting a bit close. The dragons are getting out of control. I knew it. She can't pay for this one, unlike the sheep. What on earth will she do?
It's good to remind her that she's not all powerful though. The dragons love her but she can't control them well enough. not if they're killing children.
But they're so sad to see her go! That was really upsetting, when they were crying out for her as she locked them in. Especially since it was the red and black one that's the most boisterous.
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| This badass right here |
From one really heart wrenching scene to a slightly less-so. The night's watch funeral is sad, but I'm more sad about the dragons.
OH, HI RED LADY!
Wait, is she making eyes at Jon? Is no one safe from her?
Seeing Jon talk to Tormund, there's a valid point about how Snow sees himself. He's saying he doesn't have a king? That's a bit rebellious! It'll be interesting to see how this pans out.
Oh, Ygritte I loved you so much. and she looks weirdly regal in death.
Back to Bran. Jojen's getting pretty weak now, but we've found the red and white tree! I've forgotten why we want to find it but there's triumphant music and Jojen's face is so happy. I remember when this guy was in the BBC show, Feather Boy. I cried my little heart out at that. (This was before he was in Love, Actually)
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| He's actually not changed very much at all, facially.... |
How many Direwolves are alive now? Two?
ZOMBIES!
Poor Hodor doesn't know what to do! He's so scared. Whenever Hodor gets hurt I get so sad. He's like a child.
This is all very Jason and the Argonaughts isn't it?
JOJEN, NO!
WTF. Where's this fire coming from?
This jumped up little shit of a girl is telling them to leave Jojen. I don't think I'm gonna like her.
Now he's dead. Bitch.
Smashy smashy skeletons.
The Children? Is this like Westeros' version of the lost boys? Little immortal kids that just have fun all day every day?
Nope. They're dark and mysterious and I'm not sure that I like their underground house.
The three eyed raven man is a bit spooky. Maybe he's Fagin to The Children's... um, gang.
YES, BRIENNE! Poor Poderick is a bit silly isn't he? I love all the road-trip buddy-movie stories going on in Westeros.
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| Well... this is awkward. |
ARYAAAAAAAAAAA! Is this where Brienne finds out that she's the daughter of Caitlin? Brienne is like, the best role model for Arya. I love their chat.
That moment! When they realise who the Hound is! and who Arya is!!! Yes!!!
Brienne kills this scene.
If these two fight, I want Brienne to fucking win. I want Brienne to take Arya under her wing, even though I love the Hound and Arya's road trip, buddy movie type thing.
OH MY GOD PLEASE FIGHT
I have a horrible feeling the Hound will die and Arya will run away anyway. The kid's too slippery for her own good. NOTE: I was right!!!!!!!!
Brienne has to be the one to reunite Sansa and Arya. She just has to be.
Oh my god, they're fighting dirty. DON'T YOU DARE KILL BRIENNE
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| Right in the Vagina. |
Oh, thank God, Brienne lives.
And now she's lost Arya. For fucks sake.
Arya and the Hound's final moments. There's a lot to like in this scene. Not many people are allowed last words in GoT, but I'm glad Sandor Clegane gets them. Even as he's goading Arya, he's still obviously one of the most noble characters in Westeros.
Arya's stone cold though. I love how brutal she's become as much as I hate it.
YES, JAMIE! Rescue your fucking brother! Considering how terrible the Lannisters are I end up liking them a lot more than some of the technically better people on this show. This goodbye between the two brothers is simply wonderful.
Ooh, can Tyrion go to join his lady love across the sea now?
Wait, what's going to go wrong?
Tyrion? What are you doing?
OH HELL NO.
This is too cruel. How is this allowed to happen? Tyrion is making my heart break. How the fuck did Shae end up in his father's bed? Calling his father the same nickname she had for Tyrion? What the fuck?
Now, if he doesn't kill Tywin I will be incredibly disappointed.
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| Come on, man. |
He's on the fucking toilet. This is a fitting way for him to die. Butt naked on the lavatory. Tywin is just such an arsehole all the way through this conversation.
YES
He did tell you, Tywin. He did warn you not to say that word again.
RAINS OF CASTERMERE.
Poor Tyrion. I have so much love for Varys right now, though.
Now for the sound of water to try to calm us down as Arya rides off on her pony to.... where? a coastal village?
They're off to Braavos? Is Arya going with them? Is that where Tyrion is going? Are we going to see the most badass team-up in television history? Can they please band together with Daenerys?
All Men Must Die.
All Men Must Serve.
THIS MUSIC THOUGH. I'm tingling!
THAT IS THE PERFECT WAY TO END THE SERIES.
